My entitled husband booked first class for himself and his mom, leaving me in economy with the kids. But I wasn’t going to just sit back. I made sure his “luxury” experience had a little turbulence, turning his flight into a lesson he won’t forget.
I’m Sophie and let me tell you about my husband, Clark. You know the workaholic, always stressed type, who probably thinks his job is the center of the universe? Don’t get me wrong, I get it, but hello? Being a mom isn’t exactly a spa day either. Anyway, he really outdid himself this time. You ready for this?
Okay, so we were supposed to be visiting his family for the holidays last month. The whole point was to relax, bond as a family, and give the kids some fun memories. Simple enough, right?
Clark volunteered to book the flights, and I thought, “Great, one less thing for me to worry about.”
Oh, how naive I was.
“Clark, honey, where are our seats?” I asked, juggling our toddler on one hip and a diaper bag on the other. The airport was a maze of stressed-out families and businesspeople rushing to their gates.
Clark, my dear husband of eight years, was busy tapping away on his phone. “Oh, um, about that…” he mumbled, not even looking up.
I felt a knot forming in my stomach. “What do you mean, ‘about that’?”
He finally pocketed his phone and gave me that sheepish grin I’d come to dread.
“Well, I managed to snag an upgrade for me and Mom to first class. You know how she gets on long flights, and I really need to catch up on some peaceful rest…”
Wait. An upgrade for just the two of them? I stared at him, waiting for the punchline. It didn’t come.
“So, let me get this straight,” I snapped. “You and your mother are sitting in first class, while I’m stuck in economy with both kids?”
Clark had the audacity to shrug. The nerve of this guy. Argh.
“Ah, c’mon. Stop being a drama queen! It’s just a few hours, Soph. You’ll be fine.”
As if on cue, his mother Nadia appeared, designer luggage in tow. “Oh, Clark! There you are. Are we ready for our luxurious flight?”
She smirked as if she’d won an Olympic medal and I swear I could’ve melted under her gaze.
I watched as they sauntered off towards the first-class lounge, leaving me with two cranky kids and a growing desire for revenge.
“Oh, it’ll be luxurious alright,” I muttered, a delicious, petty plan brewing in my head. “Just you wait.”
As we boarded the plane, I couldn’t help but notice the grim difference between first class and economy. Clark and Nadia were already sipping champagne while I struggled to fit our carry-on into the overhead bin.
“Mommy, I want to sit with Daddy!” our five-year-old whined.
I forced a smile. “Not this time, sweetie. Daddy and Grandma are sitting in a special part of the plane.”
“Why can’t we sit there too?”
“Because Daddy’s a special kind of jerk.”
“What was that, Mommy?”
“Nothing, honey. Let’s get you buckled in.”
As I settled the kids, I caught a glimpse of Clark reclining in his spacious seat, looking all too pleased with himself. That’s when I remembered I had his wallet. Yep! Here’s how!
As we navigated the security checkpoint earlier, I subtly lagged behind. While Clark and Nadia were engrossed in a conversation, I discreetly slipped my hand into his carry-on. I quickly located his wallet, slipped it into my bag, and resumed my place in line as if NOTHING had happened. Smart, right? I know! I know!
Okay, so back to where we left off. A wicked grin spread across my face as I watched Clark. This flight was about to get a lot more interesting.
Two hours into the flight, my kids were asleep, and I was enjoying the peace and quiet. That’s when I saw the flight attendant approaching the first-class cabin with a tray of gourmet meals. Yum!
It was like watching a dog drool over a juicy steak while I was stuck with airline pretzels.
I watched as Clark ordered the most expensive items on the menu, complete with top-shelf liquor, indulging in every luxury available.
“Would you like anything from the snack cart, ma’am?” another flight attendant asked me.
I smiled. “Just water, please. And maybe some popcorn. I have a feeling I’m about to watch quite a show.”
The attendant looked confused but obliged.
As expected, about thirty minutes later, I saw Clark frantically searching his pockets. The color drained from his face as he realized his wallet was missing.
I couldn’t hear what was being said, but his body language told me everything. The flight attendant was standing firm, hand outstretched, waiting for payment.
Clark was gesturing wildly, his voice rising just enough for me to catch snippets.
“But I’m sure I had it… Can’t we just… I’ll pay when we land!”
I sat back, munching on my popcorn. The in-flight entertainment had nothing on this. Jeez, this was EPIC!
Finally, the moment I’d been waiting for arrived. Clark, looking like a scolded schoolboy, made his way down the aisle to economy class. And to me!
“Soph,” he whispered urgently, crouching next to my seat. “I can’t find my wallet. Please tell me you have some cash.”
I put on my best-concerned face. “Oh no! That’s terrible, honey. How much do you need?”
He winced. “Uh, about $1500?”
I nearly choked on my water. “Thousand five hundred bucks? What on earth did you order? The blue whale?!”
“Look, it doesn’t matter,” he hissed, glancing nervously back at first class. “Do you have it or not?”
I made a show of rummaging through my purse. “Let’s see… I’ve got about $200. Will that help?”
The look of desperation on his face was priceless. “It’s better than nothing, I guess. Thanks.”
As he turned to leave, I called out sweetly, “Hey, doesn’t your mom have her credit card? I’m sure she’d be happy to help!”
The color drained from Clark’s face as he realized he’d have to ask his mother to bail him out. This was better than any revenge I could have planned.
The rest of the flight was delightfully awkward. Clark and Nadia sat in stony silence, their first-class experience thoroughly ruined. Meanwhile, I enjoyed my economy seat with a newfound joy.
As we began our descent, Clark made one more trip back to economy.
“Soph, have you seen my wallet? I’ve looked everywhere.”
I put on my most innocent face. “No, honey. Are you sure you didn’t leave it at home?”
He ran his hands through his hair, frustration evident. “I could’ve sworn I had it at the airport. This is a nightmare.”
“Well,” I said, patting his arm, “at least you got to enjoy first class, right?”
The look he gave me could have curdled milk. “Yeah, real enjoyable.”
As he skulked back to his seat, I couldn’t help but feel a twinge of satisfaction. Lesson learned!
After the flight, Clark was looking as sour as a lemon. Nadia had wisely disappeared into the restroom, probably to avoid the look on his face. I couldn’t blame her. It was one of those classic “if looks could kill” moments, and Clark’s mood wasn’t improving.
“I can’t believe I lost my wallet,” Clark muttered, patting down his pockets for the tenth time.
“Are you sure you didn’t leave it in first class?” I asked, doing my best to keep a straight face.
He shot me a glare. “I already checked. Twice.”
I bit my lip, holding back the grin threatening to break free. This was too good.
“Maybe it fell out during one of those fancy meals they served you.”
“Very funny, Soph. This isn’t a joke. There’s gotta be a way to track it down.”
He then let out a heavy sigh, his shoulders slumping. “I just hope someone didn’t pick it up and run off with it. All our cards are in there.”
“Yeah, that would suck!”
As Clark continued to grumble about his missing wallet, I casually zipped my purse shut, keeping my little secret tucked safely inside. I wasn’t about to let him off the hook just yet.
Besides, there was something oddly satisfying about watching him squirm a little after ditching us for first class.
As we walked out of the airport, I couldn’t help but feel a little giddy. I’d keep the wallet hidden for a while longer and treat myself to something nice with his card before handing it back. A little creative justice never hurt anyone!
So, fellow travelers, remember: if your partner ever tries to upgrade themselves and leave you behind, a little creative justice might just be the ticket to a happier journey. After all, in the flight of life, we’re all in this together… economy or first class.
Florida man arrested for vulgar sticker on truck
A Florida man was arrested for displaying an obscene bumper sticker on the back of his truck, one that either expressed his sexual preferences, or his love for a four-legged animal.
After Dillon Shane Webb was told the sticker was “derogatory,” he claimed his freedom of expression was violated, and the deputy’s office asked if he was using his free speech to express his desire of “eating a donkey.”
Keep reading to learn why Webb was arrested over a bumper sticker!
In 2019, a Columbia County sheriff’s deputy was driving behind a pickup truck when he noticed a vulgar sticker plastered on the middle of the rear window.
Dashcam footage shows Deputy Travis English stopping his cruiser in a parking lot behind the brown pickup, operated by Dillon Shane Webb, 23, with the bumper sticker in clear view.
The letters on the sticker – printed in bold white – reads, “I EAT A**.”
In the video, the deputy approaches the passenger side of the truck and after saying, “hello gentleman,” he explains that he pulled the car over due to “the derogatory sticker” displayed on the back of his truck.
In Florida, law prohibits “any sticker, decal emblem or other device attached to a motor vehicle containing obscene descriptions, photographs or depictions.”
“How’s it derogatory?” Webb asks from inside the car.
The officer replies, “How’s it not derogatory?”
“Some 10-year-old kid sitting in the passenger seat of his momma’s vehicle looks over and sees ‘I eat a**’ and asks his mom what it means,” English says. “How is she going to explain that?”
Sniping back, the driver provides the wrong answer: “That’s the parent’s job, not my job,” Webb says before he’s asked to present his driver’s license and registration.
After stepping out of the vehicle, Webb is searched, and the deputy tells him the sticker is a “misdemeanor violation of Florida’s obscene materials law.”
“I have four kids…if my 6-year-old was to look at me and like, ‘dad what does I eat a** mean?…he’s curious…and the way [you] handled this situation, I’m not pleased with,” English said before offering Webb the opportunity to explain his sticker to the court system.
Next, the deputy suggests Webb remove one of the letters from the word “A**” to read “AS.” But Webb refused, citing his constitutional right to free speech.
A few minutes later, things take a nasty turn for Webb.
After confirming with his supervisor that he had reasonable rights within the law, English steps out of his cruiser and approaches Webb, who’s leaning against his car, looking at his cellphone.
“All right Mr. Webb. Place your hands behind your back,” Webb is told. When he asks “why?” he learns “because you’re going to jail.”
Asking “for what?” English explains that he was given “the option to take that off” the window, but he “refused.”
He was then arrested and charged with the additional offense of “resisting an officer without violence.”
‘Perverted mind’
“They’re just words,” Webb later told First Coast News. “If that’s how they feel, if they have a perverted mind, that’s on them.”
But according to Sergeant Murray Smith of the Columbia County Sheriff’s Office, it wasn’t just the words on the sticker that Deputy English determined was illegal.
“It was the obscene phrase depicting what the deputy thought was a sexual act, which is obscene by definition,” said Smith. “What would a reasonable citizen think? Is the guy eating a donkey or is he doing a sexual act?”
The incident captured the attention of a lot of social media users, the majority who defended Webb.
“So what if he eats donkey. What’s the big deal?” asks one netizen. Another, referring to English speaking of his child’s potential reaction to the sticker, says, “Since when are a cop’s feelings deserving of an arrest?”
“I live here and as soon as we heard he got arrested we all went and got the sticker and put it on [our] trucks,” pens a third.
Another adds, “He better keep his kids off the internet. They will see far worse than this.”
The State Attorney’s Office cited the First Amendment and the charges against Webb were dropped. Later, Webb sued for alleged violations of his First Amendment and Fourth Amendment rights, but U.S. District Judge Marcia Morales Howard of the Middle District of Florida ruled that the arrest was “arguably justified under Florida’s obscenity law,” giving the officer and his supervisor “qualified immunity,” which means they are protected from the lawsuit.
This case underscores the ongoing debate in the U.S. over free speech and its boundaries, especially around expressions some might find offensive or derogatory. It also reflects how the First Amendment remains a contentious issue, with some insisting their right to free expression is under threat, while others argue for consideration that certain messages will have on the population.
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