Roberta Bell’s journey is a moving exampl
influence that one person can have when motivated by empathy. Roberta, a 58-year-old mother of five and grandma of eight who resides in the charming city of Vicksburg, Mississippi, is regarded by many as a hero. Her life took an unexpected turn this year, showing the world the power of love and bravery to transform lives.
Roberta met pregnant convict Katie Bourgeois, who was almost out of prison, while she was a correctional officer at the Louisiana Transitional Center for Women. Katie was in a terrible predicament because she had no relatives to support her after her kid was born. Roberta took the crucial choice to take care of the baby until Katie could return home while Katie was unable to do so.
There were, however, repercussions to this choice. Roberta was sacked from her job at the correctional facility after her supervisor saw a conflict of interest in her conduct. For Roberta, though, it was a minimal cost. Kayson, Katie’s son, was born just over a week after she lost her job. Roberta had been looking forward to his visit to the hospital. She brought him home, clothed him tenderly, and held him in her arms, showing him the tenderness and love of a mother.
Kayson was under Roberta’s care for two months before Katie was able to see her son again. Even though Roberta was going through a difficult time personally, her compassion and selflessness were evident when she said goodbye to the infant to whom she had been so close. Millions of people were moved by her heartfelt and real narrative of generosity, which struck a chord with people everywhere.
Donations poured in from people moved by her story; diapers, formula, and other necessities arrived. Numerous kind presents from strangers adorned Roberta’s living room. Even more astonishingly, their contributions added up to an incredible $90,000. Even though she was unemployed, Roberta kept giving back, using some of the money she was given to assist a fellow pregnant prisoner who was having financial difficulties.
That was not the end of Roberta’s quest. Rather, it opened a new chapter in her life. Since then, she has started a new project that she is very enthusiastic about called The Serenity House. The Serenity House, which is situated in the serene Mississippi countryside, is being renovated to serve as a haven for women reintegrating into society after serving time in jail. Roberta is committed to giving these women a place where they can find direction, support, and a feeling of belonging, just as much as she had loved her job at the prison.
Roberta gladly answers every call that comes in asking for her assistance; her phone is always vibrating. Her experience is a prime illustration of how one individual, driven by compassion, understanding, and a steadfast faith in second chances, may significantly impact the lives of others.
Matt Heath: My parting message: Enjoy things while they are around
A lot of big, tragic and important things have happened to this wonderful country of ours since April 2014. None of which I have covered. I was too busy writing about hungover parenting, ancient philosophy and my dog Colin.
Out of the 536 columns I have written, 27 were about that guy. Far too few. He is such a good boy, he deserves an article a week.
Today is the end of an era for me, and whenever these final events pop up in our lives, we can’t help but think about the ultimate end.
Everything we do, we will one day do for the last time. That’s why you have to enjoy things while they are around. It’s not just big events like leaving a job, house or loved one either. Whatever moment you happen to be in now, you will never get it back, and you don’t know how many more you have.
Everything we do in life, from eating pizza to spending time with the people we love, to driving, writing, drinking or breathing, we will one day experience for the final time. It might happen tomorrow. This can be either a depressing or an inspiring thought, depending on how you look at it.
A few years back in this column, I interviewed professor of philosophy William B Irvine, of Wright State University, Ohio, on this very topic. He put it this way on a Zoom call: “Recognition of the impermanence of everything in life can invest the things we do with a significance and intensity that would otherwise be absent. The only way we can be truly alive is if we make it our business periodically to entertain thoughts of the end.”
Today’s column is very meaningful to me because it is my last. Like the last night with a lover before she goes overseas. And just like a lover, there have been some half-arsed efforts put in from me over the years. Last week, for example, I spent 750 words moaning about how bad my cricket team is. But the truth is that any of my columns could have been the final. If I had reminded myself every week for the past 10 years that the end is inevitable, I may have been more grateful for having a column and appreciated writing them all as much as I am this one.
While everything we do could have more meaning with a focus on finitude, some things are inherently more worthwhile than others. There is no doubt my column “The pros and cons of wearing Speedos” from November 2022 was less meaningful than most things in this world. That was a waste of everyone’s time. So, if we only have so much time, how do we pick the best things to do?
Well, Oliver Burkeman, the author of Four Thousand Weeks – Time Management For Mortals, suggested this to me in a 2022 column: “Ask yourself, does this choice enlarge me? You usually know on some unspoken level if it does. That’s a good way to distinguish between options.”
With that in mind, I don’t feel great about my 2018 article on “New Zealand’s best hole”. That didn’t enlarge anyone.
There will be people reading this column right now who have loved my writing in the Herald and are sad to see it end. Others will have hated it and are glad to see me go. Many won’t have any opinion at all. But for those in the first camp, I have good news. I have a book coming out on May 28 called A Life Less Punishing – 13 Ways To Love The Life You Got (Allen and Unwin Book Publishers). It’s a deep dive into the history, philosophy and science of not wasting our time lost in anger, loneliness, humiliation, stress, fear, boredom and all the other ways we find to not enjoy perfectly good lives. It’s available for pre-order right now (google it if you’re interested).
A Life Less Punishing took me two years to write and is equivalent in words to 100 of these columns. Which would be a complete nightmare for those in the hate camp, but as I say, great news for those who want more.
Anyway, thanks to the Herald for having me, thanks to the lovely people who make an effort to say nice things to me about my column nearly every day and thanks to the universe for every single second we get.
Bless!
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