I Enlisted a Pretend Partner for Our Family Meal – It Became the Most Rewarding Choice of My Life

Family gatherings were the worst for Lara, especially since her sister, Emily, began to make fun of her love life, or lack thereof. Determined to sit through her father’s birthday dinner, Lara decides to hire a boyfriend for the night. Little did she know that a romantic comedy would play out.

I love my family, but family gatherings used to be a nightmare for me. Every single time we got together, my sister Emily would find some way or the other to poke fun at my single life.

Last Thanksgiving, she took it too far and even set a place at the table for my “imaginary boyfriend,” complete with a hand-drawn face on a napkin. Everyone around the table laughed while I forced a smile.

“It’s funny, Lara!” she would say whenever I brought up the incident.

It was anything but funny.

Now, my father’s birthday is coming up, and of course, it was to be celebrated with a family dinner.

“There’s no way I can sit through another one of those events with my family,” I told my friend, Kate, when we met for coffee.

“I’m telling you now, Emily probably has something up her sleeve already,” I grumbled.

“Then just hire someone out for the night!” Kate chuckled, adding sugar to her coffee.

“Hire a man?” I exclaimed.

“Yes! My sister did it through an agency. She didn’t want to go to her ex-boyfriend’s wedding by herself, so she found the agency. Look, it’s all above board and the guys do exactly what you need them to do.”

“It’s not… sleazy?” I asked, trying to think of a better word.

“No, Lara,” she giggled. “And you know my sister. She’s so prim and proper! She wouldn’t have gone ahead with it if she didn’t think that everything was legitimate.”

Which is how I ended up hiring a date to the family gathering. I found Jake through the same agency that Kate’s sister used. He was charming, easy to talk to, and seemed to understand exactly what I needed.

We met a few times before the dinner to get our story straight, because the last thing I wanted was Emily to get wind of something fishy.

“So, the story is that we met at a mutual friend’s party, hit it off over their dog, and have been dating for three months,” Jake said, grinning. “Sounds about right.”

“Look, any story involving myself and a dog are winners,” I replied, opening our Chinese takeout for dinner.

“And I’m an architect with a passion for cooking, right?” he confirmed.

Look Closer… Vintage Photos That Were Never Edited

Few things are as satisfying as a trip down memory lane — and it’s even better when you find something you didn’t notice before. Because as Ferris Bueller said — life moves pretty fast. Here are dozens of pictures of celebrities and remarkable people of yesteryear in all their beautiful, vintage glory. The glamour, the fashions, the hair — whether classically elegant, effortlessly cool, or interestingly tacky, we shall not see their like again. Here’s to the movie stars who were larger than life, here’s to the rock stars who lived on the edge, here’s to the comedians who still make us smile, here’s to the bit players who had those moments of glory that changed their lives forever. It’s all good, it’s all groovy, and the rest is history.

Perhaps it was her Scandinavian free-spiritedness — Swedish-born actress and singer Ann-Margret seemed on call to be as sexy as necessary. Need an actress to smother Jack Nicholson with her cleavage? Ann-Margret would do it (in Carnal Knowledge, 1972). Need an actress to writhe in satin sheets and foam, then get sprayed by baked beans? Ann-Margret’s your girl (in Tommy, 1975). Need an actress to ride a large motorcycle in a thigh-high sweater dress and calf-high boots? Ann-Margret’s raring to go (in The Prophet, 1968). Need an actress who can shake her fringe top and miniskirt like a professional go-go dancer? Ann-Margret has that exact skill (in Appointment in Beirut, 1969). Need an actress you could cover in fluorescent paint and drag around a canvas like a human paintbrush while burly men in tribal garb howl and beat their bongos? That was so Ann-Margret’s thing (in The Swinger, 1966). Need an actress to wear a bra at a photo shoot on a chilly day? Not her thing, man.–Advertisment–

“Jungle Pam” Hardy, one of drag racing’s main attractions in the ’70s.

Jim Liberman was a drag racer who went by the nickname of “Jungle Jim.” He won a lot of races in the 1970s. Fans loved him for his flamboyant personality and masterful driving. But this is not a picture of Jungle Jim — this is “Jungle Pam” Hardy, Jim’s sidekick, who commanded attention at the track with her tight, skimpy outfits. She had a job to do, as Jim’s “backup girl,” she helped guide him as he drove his Chevy Vega backward on the track after a burnout. Pam joined Jim’s team in 1973, and in 1977 Jim died on an off-track car accident. Though she only did the job for four years, Jungle Pam remains the most iconic backup girl in drag racing history.

Burt Reynolds and Farrah Fawcett during filming of the 1981 comedy “The Cannonball Run.”

The 1981 road-racing comedy The Cannonball Run was packed with star power: Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jr., Adrienne Barbeau, Mel Tillis, Terry Bradshaw, Dom DeLuise, Jackie Chan and 007 himself, Roger Moore. But you could have left all of them on the side of the road and powered to box office success with this supernaturally attractive pair of human beings: Burt Reynolds and Farrah Fawcett. He was the greatest heartthrob of the late ’70s; she had the decade’s hottest poster, and was the hottest lady detective on Charlie’s Angels, a show that was completely about conspicuously hot lady detectives. The chemistry in the movie (and this photo) wasn’t fake — Fawcett and Reynolds were romantically involved for a time.

Marcia, Marcia, Marcia! You’re gonna lose! Lose! Lose! A miffed Maureen McCormick on The Brady Bunch, 1972.

Be honest — which of these three sparklers from 1983 would you have pegged to be the future governor of Minnesota? History tells us it was Jesse “the Body” Ventura (at right), and not Randy “Macho Man” Savage or the lovely Elizabeth “Miss Elizabeth” Hulette. Randy and Elizabeth would marry the following year, and she would later debut in the WWF as Macho Man’s mysterious, glamorous manager. Sadly, neither Macho Man nor Elizabeth are with us today. Ventura, who served one term as governor and has since remained a popular political figure, occasionally floats the idea of a bid for the U.S. presidency. That seems far-fetched, as American voters would never make a crass TV blowhard the leader of the free world.

Cindy Morgan as ‘Lacey Underall’ in a scene from the comedy film “Caddyshack,” 1980.

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