I just discovered that occasionally extreme tactics are necessary to get your message across to someone. Grounding my grandchildren for what they did to my wife wasn’t going to be a sufficient lesson in this case. I set them a challenging task to ensure their redemption. I, Clarence (74), have always thought my wife Jenny (73), is the loveliest and most kindhearted person. This was particularly true with regard to our grandchildren. She knits them exquisitely detailed sweaters every year for their birthdays and Christmas. She puts all of her heart into this tradition. She would frequently begin new initiatives more earlier than necessary.
This was done to guarantee that every child received a unique item created particularly for them. She would make the kids stuffed animals for their birthdays. Maybe a blanket for the grandchildren who are older. We just had a trip and decided to stop by our neighborhood thrift store last week. For our landscaping project, we were trying to find some old-fashioned pots. What was supposed to be a relaxing trip became an unforgettable, heartbreaking experience!Something I wish we could take back from our shared history. My wife stopped as we were browsing the aisles. Her gaze fixed on something, causing her to momentarily stop. “What the heck is that? She questioned, gesturing with a quivering finger, “Am I seeing things? The sweaters she had crocheted for our grandchildren were hanging there among a gazillion other trashed stuff! All of them were for sale! Among them, there was a blue-and-grey-striped one that was definitely the one Jenny made for our oldest grandchild last Christmas.
\It was clear from the expression on her face. She stretched out and caressed the fabric softly, and her heart broke. She tried to hide her pain with a grin and a repression of tears. Her voice was barely audible as she said, “It’s okay, I understand that kids might be embarrassed to wear grandma’s sweaters.” I could hardly contain my emotions as I drew her closer for an embrace, realizing how hurt she was. No, this wasn’t acceptable, and unfortunately for our family, my wife was more understanding than I was. They committed a heartless, destructive, and blatantly cruel act! Even though she maintained her composure, I couldn’t help but feel furious! Once I was sure she was asleep, I went back to the thrift store that evening and bought back everything she had made! I had made up my mind to put this right. I made the decision to impart a significant life lesson to our grandchildren without even speaking to my wife! One that would instill in them the value of showing gratitude for future blessings. I made a package for each grandchild the following day. I put wool, knitting needles, and a basic set of knitting instructions inside each. I added a picture of the sweater they had thrown away along with a severe note that said, “I know what you did.” You had better start knitting your own gifts now!”Grandma and I are coming for dinner, and you better be wearing her presents,” I said in my note. Alternatively, I’ll notify your parents and you won’t receive any further gifts for birthdays or Christmas. As one could guess, there was a wide range of reactions! A few of the grandchildren apologized sheepishly over the phone. They acknowledged that they were unaware of the significance of these gifts. Some remained mute, maybe feeling awkward or not knowing what to say. But the point had been made. When dinnertime finally arrived, there was a palpable sense of excitement. Our grandkids arrived one by one. All of them wearing the sweaters that nobody thought were worthy. To be very honest, some of the art they produced was absurdly poor! The one short design and one long hand made me chuckle uncontrollably! Some sweaters were obviously dropped mid-project, while others were simply too large! Not a single reproduction could have done MY Jenny’s original work justice. When sincere regret was expressed through their apologies, the tension subsided. Our oldest grandchild stated to their parents, “We are so sorry for taking your gifts for granted, Grandma,” while their parents watched. “We swear never to give away anything you’ve lovingly made for us ever again.” They made an attempt at knitting. They became aware of the passion and work that went into every stitch as a result. “Our oldest grandchild admitted that this was harder than he had anticipated, Grandpa.”
He continued tugging at the sleeves of his hurriedly constructed attempt as he spoke. Another person said, “Yeah, I’m sorry, Grandma,” with wide eyes. “It took me hours to finish one section of a scarf!” Bless her heart, my wife pardoned them, giving each one her customary warmth and compassion. “I’m amazed you got them to do this much!” Jenny loved our grandchildren and turned to face me. I needed to take action, my darling. I couldn’t allow them to believe that your gifts were just throwaway objects. I knew I had made the right decision when we embraced and she opened her warm heart to me. The laughter increased and the mood lightened as we ate dinner. This difficult lesson bonded everyone. It served as a helpful reminder of the importance of recognizing and appreciating one another’s work. Ultimately, our grandchildren gained knowledge about love, respect, and the elegance of a handcrafted gift in addition to learning how to knit a basic stitch. My wife felt better when she saw that her efforts were eventually recognized. I discovered how much of an impact she had on bringing our family together. The grandchildren added one more thing as we were wrapping up our dinner: “We promise to cherish our handmade gifts forever.” A promise that brought my wife more warmth than any sweater could have! I said to them, “I have one last surprise for you all,” before I left. I ran to the car and returned with a bunch of big plastic bags. “Open them,” I told our grandchildren. When they discovered every sweater Jenny had given them, they were all beaming with happiness. When they transitioned from their awful attempts at knitting to the flawless sculptures my wife had made them, they were like completely different persons. “Grandma and grandpa, thank you so much!” they exclaimed as they gave us a warm hug before we left. The spouse of a woman in the following tale was in need of some important life lessons. Before she put her foot down, he had developed the poor habit of making purchases—big and small—without getting her approval.
10 Cultural Tips You Need to Be Aware of Before Traveling to India
There are some traditions that have not gotten lost in time and are still respected. Every country and culture is different from one another, and India is a great example of this. People behave, eat, and even dress differently. They have their own traditions and customs, and as tourists, these need to be honored. And this is exactly what we’d like to bring forth in this article.
We at Bright Side have been mesmerized by the uniqueness of Indian culture, so we’d like to share with you a few useful tips to make the most out of your trip.
1. You must not touch books or instruments with your feet.
In India, children are taught from a young age that books are knowledge. They even have a Goddess of Learning, Saraswati. Therefore, touching books with one’s feet or even kicking a school bag full of notebooks or books is considered disrespectful.
Any instrument that is used to develop one’s knowledge is also considered very important and must not be touched by the feet. Even pens and pencils are important, according to Indian culture, and must be respected as such.
2. Don’t be afraid to explore Indian street food.
Exploring foreign cuisine is generally very important when visiting other countries, and sometimes the best food around is the kind made at that small corner vendor. And Indian food is no exception, as it’s one of the richest cuisines out there. It’s a must-try for sure. Just watch out for that extra-spicy food!
As with any street food experience, you must be careful. Seek fresh food, avoid milk products as they can sometimes be spoiled, avoid ice or water that was not heated well (definitely try to avoid tap water), and generally look forward to trying clean (and busy) vendors.
3. Don’t be too polite.
Saying “please” and “thank you” is normal and respectful for us, like at a restaurant or a shop. However, in India, when used too much, you can come across as rude or impolite. Who would’ve thought, right?
When it comes to friends and family, traditional ways of showing appreciation can sometimes create tension or express a level of formality that should not exist. Instead of saying “thank you,” you can try saying “I appreciate it.”
4. Only use your right hand when giving or taking anything.
Many cultures have actually adopted this practice. In many cultures, the right hand is considered pure and even lucky! In India, it is believed that the left hand is impure, as it is used for cleaning shoes, feet, and generally dirty work. So when it comes to food, drinks, and handing objects to other people, we must always use the right hand to show respect.
5. Do not point your finger.
Usually, we use our pointer finger to give directions at a restaurant or generally when referring to something in particular. But this is definitely not the case in India.
Pointing your finger at an object or place is considered rude and impolite. If you wish to give directions or point out something to someone, you must do so by using your whole palm or your thumb. This way, it’s more gentle and polite.
6. Expect to use cash only.
If you’re visiting a small town in India, you should expect to pay with cash most of the time. While in the bigger cities, malls, restaurants, and shops, credit or debit cards may be accepted, they are still rare, and the smaller cities make use of cash. So it would be smart to keep some cash with you, just in case.
7. Not everyone is going to speak English.
Of course, you might be lucky enough to be able to use English inside bigger cities, restaurants, hotels, or certain shops, however, this is not the case for smaller villages. Here, you should expect people to use their native language, which is not necessarily a bad thing.
Spending time among foreign people and hearing their native language might actually do you some good. You can pick up a new language, getting to know a new culture.
8. Learn about and use traditional greetings.
Respect is required everywhere you go in the world, and India is no exception. You can show your respect for the country and its people by learning about their culture and traditional greetings. One such greeting that is used in a general manner is “namaste.” You can put your palms together and bow to show respect while saying namaste, or, if you’d like to be more formal, you can use “namaskar.”
As English has become more globalized, “hello’’ is also used, especially among tourists and foreigners. Just know that “goodbye” is usually not used, as it implies you won’t be seeing each other anymore, or that you are asking for permission to leave.
9. Don’t use public displays of affection.
Public display of affection is generally looked down upon as it is quite a private thing. However, in India, you must not show affection in public. When you visit a new or foreign country, you might want to blend in with other people so as to not get unwanted stares. This is one of those things you must do.
Try and avoid holding hands or using overly affectionate gestures in public, as it is frowned upon. You can even spend time in jail!
10. Know that in small towns, you must wear decent clothes.
One of the most important things to keep in mind when coming to India is the way you present yourself. As a quite conservative country, it’s good to respect its culture and people, and you can start with your clothes. Even if it’s hot outside, try and cover yourself. This way, you can pay your respects to the country, and also make yourself look like a local.
If you’re visiting a particular attraction, it’s important to wrap a scarf around your head to show respect and politeness.
Have you ever traveled to India? Which aspect of Indian culture intrigues you the most?
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