Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good man to you in our 7 years of marriage & I have nothing to show for it.
These last 2 weeks have been tough for me. Your boss notified me that you quit your job today & that was just too much to bear any longer.
Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.
You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife.
Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, It’s over and I am leaving.
Your EX-Husband
P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Dear Ex-Husband,
Believe me, nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s definitely true that you & I have been married for the past 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been.
I watch my TV shows so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping, although that doesn’t seem to work.
I definitely noticed your haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ And since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I decided not to comment.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 long years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could make this work. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone.
Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem!
Please share this story with your friends and family if you think it was funny.
Earth is getting another moon at the end of this month
When the new moon begins its orbit, life as we know it is going to alter, if not permanently.
At the end of this month, another moon will momentarily arrive on Earth.
Indeed, it may seem completely absurd to write or even mention that our planet will momentarily have a new moon, but it is true.
By the end of this month, a mini-moon—a tiny asteroid—will begin its orbit around the Earth and continue until November 25.
For the next week, the asteroid known as “2024 PT5” will join our moon, which has been orbiting Earth for the past four billion years, on its trip.
“The object that is going to pay us a visit belongs to the Arjuna asteroid belt, a secondary asteroid belt made of space rocks that follow orbits very similar to that of Earth at an average distance to the sun of about 93 million miles [150 million kilometers],” Professor Carlos de la Fuente Marcos said in a statement to Space about it.The population of near-Earth objects that includes comets and asteroids includes those found in the Arjuna asteroid belt.”
Leading the study team is Marcos, who is supported by a group of scientists.
The Arjuna asteroid belt is a varied tangle of space rocks, and because of its near-Earth orbit, it is predicted to round the planet once more in January.
The tiny asteroid will move at 2,200 mph and be only 2.8 million miles from Earth, which may sound like a very long way, but in space it is actually much closer than you might imagine.
The International Space Station orbits the earth at 17,500 miles per hour to put it into perspective.
“Under these circumstances, the object’s geocentric energy may grow negative, and the object may become a temporary moon of Earth,” he said. This particular object will be subjected to this process for around two months, beginning next Monday.
Saying: “It will not follow a full orbit around Earth.”You could argue that items like 2024 PT5 are window shoppers if a genuine satellite is comparable to a consumer making a purchase inside a store.”
So how do we identify it?
Sadly, you can’t, at least not with common household objects like binoculars or a telescope your mother got you.
No, because of its size, 2024 PT5 is far more difficult to see.
Marcos went on, “Most amateur telescopes and binoculars cannot resolve the object because it is too small and dim.” But the object is well inside the brightness range of the average telescope that is used by astronomers in their profession.”A 30-inch telescope with a human eye behind it will not be sufficient to examine this object; a telescope with a minimum diameter of 30 inches and a CCD or CMOS detector are required.”
Leave a Reply