My husband and I bought our granddaughter a wedding gift from her registry. She reached out and accused us of being cheap after getting the wedding present. Now, she is upset and threatens to cut us off because we didn’t give her the cash gift that we presented to each of our grandkids a day before their wedding.
An elderly couple | Source: Getty Images
I’m in my 70s, a proud grandmother to five amazing grandkids: three women and two men. I adore my grandkids and often show up for them emotionally and financially. Whenever they have celebrations or hard times, they know that they can count on me.
Grandparents with their grown grandkids | Source; Getty Images
The youngest of grandkids, Eloise, got married last October. My husband, who is also in his 70s, and I have a tradition for our grandkids. We buy a small gift from the wedding registry, usually the cheapest item, and then, the day before the wedding, we give them a check for $40,000.
We hope they’ll use it for a house, but it’s ultimately their choice. We also ask them to keep it a secret, considering our large family. Until now, everyone has respected this request.
Happy young woman opening a gift | Source: Getty Images
This time, we sent an air fryer to our youngest granddaughter, the cheapest thing on her registry. Eloise called us, livid, accusing us of being cheap. I remember picking up her call and she didn’t even say hi, she just started ranting, “Seriously, Grandma? I just got your gift. An air fryer? That’s the cheapest thing you could find on my registry!”
Woman rejecting a gift | Source: Getty Images
I was taken aback because as much as the air fryer was the cheapest on their registry, I still thought it’d be useful to them, so I told her that. Eloise kept on complaining, “Useful? Come on, you know you can do better than that. Everyone knows you have the money. I just can’t believe you’d be this cheap with me. It’s embarrassing.”
An air fryer | Source: Getty Images
In this heated moment, I told her, “Yes, you’re right. We are cheap, old, and useless. The only thing you DIDN’T know is that the day before the wedding, we were going to gift you a check for $40,000.”
Woman disappointed by a gift | Source: Getty Images
I revealed this in an attempt to explain to Eloise about the cash gift we usually give our grandkids before the wedding but she was so angry at this point, that she wasn’t listening to a thing I said. I speculated that maybe she didn’t believe we would gift her such an amount of money after only buying her an air fryer.
Eventually, she said, “No, it’s clear. You just don’t love me enough to show it. You know how much pressure I’m under with the wedding. And then, this? It’s like you don’t even care,” then she hung up.
Disappointed elderly couple | Source: Getty Images
Despite my husband and I’s shock at Eloise’s reaction, we then bought her a China set, hoping to appease her, but decided against giving her the $40,000, feeling she hadn’t earned it.
Fast forward to last week. Eloise talked to her brother and found out that we were telling her the truth about the money. After confirming it with her cousins, she, called again, accusing us of discrimination, “I just found out that it’s true you gave the money to everyone else when they got married. Why didn’t I get anything?”
A cash gift | source: Getty Images
We stood firm, explaining our stance was due to her initial reaction, “We felt after your reaction to the wedding gift, it wasn’t right to go ahead and gift you the money.” Eloise pleaded trying to convince us otherwise, “So, you’re punishing me? Is that it? Because I was upset about an air fryer?”
Woman throwing tantrums | Source: Getty Images
I was angry that she didn’t even understand what she did wrong. “It wasn’t about the air fryer, Eloise. It was how you spoke to us, the disrespect. That’s not something we expected or can support,” I explained.
Bewildered elderly woman on phone | Source: Getty Images
Eloise implored us, nearly in tears, “But that’s so unfair! I was stressed, Grandma. Planning a wedding is hard, and I just snapped. I didn’t mean any of it.” I felt like she should have only apologized to us instead of finding excuses to justify her behavior.
However, I told her, “We understand that it’s a stressful time, but actions and words have consequences. We hoped you’d understand the value of family and love over material things.” Full of desperation, Eloise added, “But you don’t understand! Can’t we just forget all this happened? I need that money, Grandma.”
Young woman holding back tears on phone | Source: Getty Images
She pleaded, threatened to boycott Christmas, and accused us of cutting her off but we didn’t budge. In the end, I expressed, “We love you very much. This has nothing to do with cutting you off. We just hope you’ll reflect on this and understand why we made our decision.”
Woman showing threatening finger | Source: Getty Images
Now, Eloise has followed up on her threat and she’s boycotting Christmas. Her mother, who is our daughter-in-law, is siding with her, calling us unreasonable. However, we feel that after all we have done for Eloise, the air fryer gift, shouldn’t have triggered this reaction.
Bewildered elderly couple | Source: Getty Images
For context, we had already paid for her college, and her parents covered her graduate school and half the wedding. Additionally, she and her husband are financially comfortable and do not desperately need our money.
We’re also not upset with our grandkids for revealing the cash gift since she is among the group of family members who are allowed to know about it. Our reason for sending the air fryer earlier was that we live far away, so we always send our gifts early.
Elderly couple enjoying family time | Source: Getty Images
The wedding gift is also separate from the money, which we give with the hope it will be used for something significant, like a home. Now, we feel like the action we took towards Eloise was well deserved and we are not going back on our decisions even if she and her mom threaten to do their worst.
Despite the tumultuous events and Eloise’s refusal to understand our perspective, my husband and I stand by our decision. Love and respect in our family are paramount, and we hoped this situation would be a learning experience for her.
Elderly couple with family on Christmas | Source: Getty Images
The holidays might be quieter this year with her family’s absence, but our hope is for healing and understanding in the future. Our door and hearts remain open to Eloise, whenever she’s ready to mend fences.
A former prison guard from Mississippi loses her job for caring for an inmate’s newborn, and her perspective
Roberta Bell’s journey is a moving example of the courage and strength of compassion, demonstrating the enormous influence that one person can have when motivated by empathy. Roberta, a 58-year-old mother of five and grandma of eight who resides in the charming city of Vicksburg, Mississippi, is regarded by many as a hero. Her life took an unexpected turn this year, showing the world the power of love and bravery to transform lives.
Roberta met pregnant convict Katie Bourgeois, who was almost out of prison, while she was a correctional officer at the Louisiana Transitional Center for Women. Katie was in a terrible predicament because she had no relatives to support her after her kid was born. Roberta took the crucial choice to take care of the baby until Katie could return home while Katie was unable to do so.
There were, however, repercussions to this choice. Roberta was sacked from her job at the correctional facility after her supervisor saw a conflict of interest in her conduct. For Roberta, though, it was a minimal cost. Kayson, Katie’s son, was born just over a week after she lost her job. Roberta had been looking forward to his visit to the hospital. She brought him home, clothed him tenderly, and held him in her arms, showing him the tenderness and love of a mother.
Kayson was under Roberta’s care for two months before Katie was able to see her son again. Even though Roberta was going through a difficult time personally, her compassion and selflessness were evident when she said goodbye to the infant to whom she had been so close. Millions of people were moved by her heartfelt and real narrative of generosity, which struck a chord with people everywhere.
Donations poured in from people moved by her story; diapers, formula, and other necessities arrived. Numerous kind presents from strangers adorned Roberta’s living room. Even more astonishingly, their contributions added up to an incredible $90,000. Even though she was unemployed, Roberta kept giving back, using some of the money she was given to assist a fellow pregnant prisoner who was having financial difficulties.
That was not the end of Roberta’s quest. Rather, it opened a new chapter in her life. Since then, she has started a new project that she is very enthusiastic about called The Serenity House. The Serenity House, which is situated in the serene Mississippi countryside, is being renovated to serve as a haven for women reintegrating into society after serving time in jail. Roberta is committed to giving these women a place where they can find direction, support, and a feeling of belonging, just as much as she had loved her job at the prison.
Roberta gladly answers every call that comes in asking for her assistance; her phone is always vibrating. Her experience is a prime illustration of how one individual, driven by compassion, understanding, and a steadfast faith in second chances, may significantly impact the lives of others.
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